Yesterday, I had lunch with a new friend. She met me at my hotel and we drove down the street to a nearby restaurant. It was very busy, although the line was not to long. After we got our food we settled into a little corner booth and asked the Lord to bless our food for our bodies and our fellowship for our souls.
As we talked we shared our lives with each other. We talked about our children, family activities, nutrition, marriage, ministry, etc. We were all over the place. It was great! ( You ladies know what I mean) We shared about what the Lord is doing in our lives individually and how we love Him.
As we were discussing marriage and the challenges and blessings that come to it as a result of ministry, it was so obvious to me that this is where she shines. Not because she is boastful or prideful, but because her life is fruitful in this area. So, here the teaching began. In almost 21 years of marriage, she has never argued with her husband. Now I didn't say that they never have had conflict, but that she has not argued with her husband. I asked her, what does this look like and how did she get there.
She said it was a CHOICE to choose God's way. To honor her husband, to not say disrespectful things, or raise her voice at him in the midst of conflict. She said that it starts with a desire to please God, to obey His word as a wife. I confessed that I am the one in my relationship that usually begins an argument. Sometimes it is unintentional and other times....well other times it is intentional.
She encouraged me to love on my husband, especially in those times when I may be feeling a bit neglected by him. Both of our husbands are bi-vocational. They are pastors at our churches and hold down full time jobs. That leaves little time for sitting on the couch and cuddling. My friend's suggestion to me was instead of withdrawing and withholding when my husband has been extra busy, I should draw him in. Love on him, sit on his lap, call him just to tell him that I love him, by him a special treat, PRAY for him.
And oh how this blesses our children. It makes them want to bless their daddy too. And by the way, it endears the children's heart to their mother also. My friend's children love their parents. It shows! And guess what? They are teenagers.
The Lord is faithful to direct our steps. I got to know a new friend better and learned a lesson in choosing life for my marriage. The lesson was to choose to love my husband at all times. To honor him, obey (yes, it is what the Word says) and respect him. Seek to be a blessing and not to be blessed. To bless my children by loving their daddy, holding my tongue, and instead let the law of kindness be on my tongue.
Lisa......
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